The minivan may have lost its hip image but once you see what's inside, you'll understand why it is still the best vehicle for hauling people.
Sure, if you're a battle-tested mom or dad, with the thousand-yard backseat stare and juice-spattered uniform to prove it, a pair of six-hour drives wouldn't make you blink.
I, on the other hand, am a new recruit, the fresh meat of fatherhood, learning more every day about my 10-month-old daughter. Fortunately my wife Carmen is officer material, adept at both missions and logistics. But faced with our first all-day road trip with baby Bianca — along with a close friend and her tempestuous two-year-old — Carmen was looking as shaky and doomed as a D-Day beachcomber in Saving Private Ryan.
Fortunately, our landing vehicle was the new Chrysler Town & Country.
Yes, a minivan. Now it was my turn to look shaky.
Actually, I've mostly gotten over my longtime minivan aversion, ever since the Honda Odyssey began setting a high bar for these boxy family haulers. As auto journalists never tire of repeating, the best minivans flat-out whip most SUVs for carrying people and all their stuff. A minivan often handles better and guzzles less gas, while still delivering more useful interior space. And you can't beat their sliding, barn-door-sized portals for loading gear or climbing in and out.
The drawback, of course, is that your hipster neighbors or smart-ass brother-in-law might see you driving a minivan. Lame jokes about soccer moms or socks-with-sandals fashions are sure to follow. Interestingly, more women than men tell me they would rather be comatose than set foot in a minivan.
But ignore the subdivision scoffers — better yet, laugh at them while they're trying to squeeze into the back of a Cadillac Escalade — and a minivan like the Chrysler can become an indispensable machine.
At first glance there's certainly nothing groundbreaking about the all-new 2008 Town & Country. The body is square and traditional enough to be minivan retro -- a veritable box of Cheerios for the childrearing set.
Read: First Drive: 2008 Dodge Grand Caravan and Chrysler Town & Country
But for minivans, it's what's inside that counts. And what's inside the Chrysler soothed the kids and saved our butts on that long Vermont drive.
The first big addition is the Chrysler's optional Swivel 'n Go seats, a pair of leather-clad captain's chairs that swivel 180 degrees to face the back. An RV-style, stowaway table easily pops into place between the second and third rows — perfect for snacks, games, whatever.
Next up was the new SIRIUS Backseat TV, with three live channels of kids' programming: Disney, Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon. For now the first-ever satellite TV that doesn't require a bulky, unsightly roof dish is exclusive to Chrysler vehicles. And unlike traditional satellite signals, easily blocked by buildings or natural features, the SIRIUS network of land-based repeaters ensured that we never lost the picture, even in the middle of Manhattan (the picture, compressed to travel over the network, was only acceptable for live broadcasts, but looked great for cartoons).
And where minivan veterans have come to expect a DVD screen, the Chrysler took it to the next level: The Town & Country featured three DVD screens and dual DVD players with wireless headphones.
Ah, sweet peace: Carmen and I could listen to our own tunes (iPod, satellite radio, CDs), while separate programs played in back. And with twin DVD players, we could even listen to the music while the kids watched separate discs, live TV, or video games in back.
The result was that little Bianca and Lola watched Dora the Explorer for hours without making a fuss — and without the show sending me into a homicidal sing-along rage. Not to pick on poor Dora, but couldn't she explore for some new pals who do more than shriek off-key?
Now, I know our nostalgic ideal is for car-bound kids to enjoy the scenery; to play I Spy, Slug Bug or other old-school road games instead of zoning out with the TV. But as long as the TV screen isn't a 24/7 crutch for every ride to grocery store, I'll call it a technological lifesaver.
The Chrysler eased the trip in other ways: Either or both sections of its third-row seat powered below the floor with one touch of a button. That seat also power-reverses to face out the hatch, creating a cushy perch for tailgating or, well, watching the kids' soccer games.
Rolling back into New York, I mentally tipped my cap to my Chrysler co-pilot. And with Bianca and Lola sound asleep in back, I had time to think again about why so many people are allergic to minivans. Drive a minivan, the thinking goes, and you'll wake up to find you've turned into your parents. Next step, a riding mower and a Florida retirement.
But watching my baby girl snoozing away in a car seat, the realization hit me: Turning into your parents isn't the worst thing that could happen. Not by a long shot.
A Michigan native raised and forged in Detroit and a former auto critic at the Detroit Free Press, Lawrence Ulrich now lives in Brooklyn, New York. His reviews and features appear regularly in The New York Times, Robb Report, Popular Science and Travel + Leisure Golf.
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